Its that moment. Yes, when you're staring into blank space and you just begin to think about all you've done till now. C'mon, don't lie to yourself, you know you've had it. Be it once or twice or countless times, you know what I'm talking about.
Weirdly enough, I must say this is quite a fitting song to be listening to. Heh! Well well, here I am in the States. Never thought I'd actually get here for free but hey, I'm not complaining. Though next time, I'd like to be here to take a real holiday. And hopefully it'll be with my baby girl. That'll be nice. No worries about where I am with her. No complains. Except that I miss her too much. In fact I worry I maybe a little dependent her. More than I'd like but know her, it's exactly what she wants. Rachel's like that. She's pure and the only thing she wants is to make me happy. I know it. Best part? She doesn't go out of her way. I know that sounds stupid but when you think about it, it's those extravagant notions of love that makes one partner feel out of place. Simply because to reciprocate would be impossible. That was she does for me. She makes me feel that I meant to be there, beside her, always.
She is the best thing that's happened to me till now. Of that I'm sure. =)
On other aspects, I'm a little disappointed. But I think out of that I've learnt a very painful truth. My friends still can't seem to agree with each other and it's caused problems between them. This means that my family's split. I can't believe I'm saying it but I'm done. I'm too tired. And as much as I hate it to admit it, I tried everything and failed. Social media has triumphed once again. Not has it rocked the world wide web as we know it but it's also cause my family to split. I believe a lot of this could be avoided without social media. Nothing would change their personalities but I feel that social media hastened the split.
And the lesson I've learnt? Just like how ordinary families see parent separate, kids leave the home and relatives unable to agree with other, I guess I must deal with the fact that my perfect family will no longer be one solid structure.
How is this going to affect our lives is something I have to leave to fate. I tried my best but with the number of times this has occured, I know it's out of my hands. As ridiculous as it sounds, all I can do is HOPE for things to be fine.
Argh, I hate this. 15 days till I'm home.
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