Those 3 words.

I am constantly tempted to say them. There are soo many junctures I would've just let it all out but I know she's not ready.

Hell. Am I even ready? I mean I knowhow feel that way but am I in a place where I know I can be the person I want to be for her?

I don't know. All I do know is that she makes me happy and this is not something I'm gonna let go easily.

Ended off the semester on a HIGH!

Walk on by - Noosa

So I did pretty good! 4 Bs!! 2 plusses and 2 minuses but hey, in my books it's still pretty good!!

That has helped my GPA quite a bit and I'm really happy =)

Things with Rachelyn have been amazing. We've had those conversations which have got us thinking about us but overall, I know that the feelings which have washed over me with regards to her have been nothing short of bliss.

I'm not happy with my body but the break in for next semester will give me sometime to actually start exercising and try for Gold again. It would be quite an achievement for me to get it and put it back on my the sleeve of my uniform. Hate how it hasn't been there for the past two years. Pretty damn annoying.

So somehow I've been toying with the idea of leaving Singapore more and more as time goes by. Don't get me wrong, life is still pretty good but, there's just something about the conversations I have been having which have been pushing me towards that idea. Maybe I should get down to some serious researching on whether it is a viable option for me if and when I decide to leave the force.

Something to ponder about...

Waaaay Post Birthday.

London Grammar- Strong

Birthday was good. Quite a few surprises and hey, honestly one of the best birthdays I've had. Just enough time to spend with all those important people in my life :) I'd say that's just about right. Heh.

Disappointed myself a week later at a beach party but I'm working on it. I know I'm trying. I tried that night but obviously not hard enough. Must remember to eat. Can't keep going to these sessions without any food. I mean I obviously don't wanna give up drinking completely. But at the same I can't keep being irresponsible. And it's hard to find the balance because I just don't know where that damn line is.

Fuckin hell.

Someone I know had to put her pet down and I can't stop thinking about Nikki whether she's with Jakes. I've yet to dream of her and.. I don't know. It just doesn't feel.. right. I know that's weird and that I've been away from Nikki for soo long but.. Oh well..

I pray for those who have lost a loved one, any being that loved one may be, for the strength to pull through it. They're in a better place where they're smiling, happy and well taken care of. It may or may not be true but having thoughts of them happy makes it a little easier to deal with their absence.

There's a lot to be thankful for. Let's try to make sure we prevent the regret we now feel when we all eventually, yeah.